Following

 John 6:56-69

Here we are, still dwelling on this text in John of Jesus being the bread and drink of life. Jesus is still explaining it for those who don't understand still and won't understand when he finishes and maybe we don't fully get it either. Do we really understand and follow Jesus in John?

Lets look at a few of the disciples who don't understand Jesus. First up is Nicodemus, yes, we will count him because in the end Nicodemus is the one who asks for Jesus body and gets it into the tomb. He is the one who asks how he can be born again, can he go back into his mothers womb. Then Jesus goes off into this Spirit talk about wind and not knowing where it comes from or goes and how this is Spirit, how the Spirit is animates being born again. Understand?

Or maybe its Thomas. In John Thomas has a bigger role in not understanding Jesus words. Like when Lazarus is sick and Jesus first says to Thomas they won't go to him and then says they will because he has fallen asleep. Thomas somehow interprets all that as if Jesus is going to die and they will follow him to death. Well, that isn't what happens, the rest of the story is that Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead. Understand?

Or maybe its Nathaniel who we don't meet in any other gospel except this one and only believes because Jesus truly sees him before he came to him and tells him what he was doing before. The list goes on from there, the disciples as a whole seeing him talk to a woman at a well. Or the time he appears to them in the upper room, yet they don't get it until they are fishing on the beach. Or Mary at the tomb, or during the storm, or at the cross. Understand?

We like to understand. To think we can figure it all out and put Jesus into this lovely little understanding we have. It breaks Jesus down into rules, do's and don't's and makes it easier for us to look at. Its why we come to church to have all the mystery revealed and watered down so we might follow. 

What if instead we are being asked today to embrace the mystery and things we don't understand? What if instead, Jesus is looking at us too, and asking if we will leave or stay in this and still follow? Can we honestly answer, as Peter did, where else would we go, that we would still follow?

This is what John's gospel really has to offer us. If we read well and examine closely we can see that what brings life is stepping into uncertainty and most of us don't like that. It opens to us the door of mystery, starting with creation and the play of light and dark. Understand?

Will you still follow? Can you throw open your arms wide to the mystery and not hold onto it? Will you follow Jesus, even in the darkness?